How to deal with conflicts and problems in a relationship?

First, if the other party has not blocked or deleted you, please stop pestering immediately
What is pestering?
For example, sending messages non-stop, calling constantly, writing short essays at every turn, chasing and blocking, mobilizing all relatives and friends to help persuade, begging for apologies and reconciliation, etc.
Blind pestering will not only make your remaining dignity and goodwill disappear, but also make the relationship between the two of you more tense, and it is easy to be blocked and deleted by the other party.
More importantly, all your energy is used to entangle the other party, and you have no patience to think about the current situation, the reason why the other party left, and the correct way to save the relationship.
Why can’t pestering make the other party come back?
Because the essence of pestering is actually that you are begging the other party to come back by playing the emotional card.
You hope that exposing your deep affection and misery to the other party will make him come back because of softness and sympathy, but at this moment, is the emotional card really useful?
For a true breakup, the decision to break up is definitely not made by the other party on impulse, but after a period of observation and entanglement, after repeated weighing, he thinks that you are not the one he wants to be with for a long time, so he has to break up.
This means that the other party’s rationality prevails and the emotional component is greatly reduced.
When the other party is very rational, he thinks about the pros and cons, good and bad of a relationship.
And you are still in the emotional stage. Sensitivity is low-dimensional, and rationality is high-dimensional. You can’t satisfy what the other party wants, but you just ask for what you want from the other party. How is this possible?
Maybe the reason for the breakup is your trouble, but there is no right or wrong in feelings. There is no need to blame yourself or the other party too much. Self-pity, blaming others, overeating, and losing your appetite are absolutely unacceptable.
This will only increase the psychological burden of both of you. Even if you win back the other party for a while, you will only get sympathy, not love.
Fake reconciliation is due to the other party’s momentary softness and impulse. True reconciliation must go through self-reflection and review of the relationship, truly solving the problems between the two of you, and starting a new relationship, rather than repeating the same mistakes.
People all have the psychology of “loss aversion

“. You were chasing him before, and your presence was very high. He didn’t have the opportunity to experience the feeling of really losing you. If you suddenly disappear, this unexpected loss will suddenly arouse his “loss aversion”.
He will be curious about you and can’t help but secretly see what you are doing in many ways.
Because you are so inseparable from him, whether he looks for you on social networks, thinks about you in his mind, or asks someone about you, he is investing time, energy and feelings in you, and only then will the initiative return to you.
What should I do if there is still contact?
If you still have WeChat, phone, QQ and other communication methods, a good strategy to save the relationship is to
position your relationship as friends,
treat yourself as an ordinary friend of the other party, so that your actions will no longer bring pressure to the other party, and keep this relationship window, so that we can continue to display it later.
Otherwise, you can’t get in touch, and no matter how many skills you have, there is nowhere to display them.
There are several key points you need to know when being friends:
1. You can be more humorous when speaking;
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2. The sense of need should be lower, because you are just ordinary friends;
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3. It’s good if the chat feels like a friendship;
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4. Don’t care too much about his life;
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5. Let him notice the changes in your life and status.
Don’t think that you will be friends for life if you become friends. Any relationship develops step by step. When you developed from strangers to lovers, didn’t you also go through the stage of friends?
Being friends is just a temporary strategy of retreating to advance. We need to lurk around each other first, find the right opportunity and time to reconnect, slowly wash away the negative impression left by ourselves, and create a new good impression.
If you want to get your ex back efficiently, you must not rely on brute force, but on the correct cognition of emotions and scientific direction and method.
Only when the direction is right can your efforts bring you positive feedback, otherwise it is easy to go in the opposite direction.
If you want to reconcile but are not sure what the right method is for you, you might as well click the link below to add my WeChat account and chat with me. I believe it will bring you different inspiration and insights.